>Birds

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From vacation2010

When we were in Ouray this summer, I was sad to see the hood of our van propped up, and Dave and Grandad peering inside. What is worse that car trouble on vacation? But it wasn’t a mechanical problem. The problem was that there was a hummingbird trapped deep in the dashboard. And by “problem” I mean “horrifying situation.” They couldn’t get the bird out, so the only option was to let it… I can’t even say it. So what is the best way to take your mind off the fact that a hummingbird is going to die a terrible death in your dashboard? Why, going for a drive to a ghost town on an incredibly steep, winding, mountain roads with no guardrails.

On the way back, Dave was driving, Grandad was in the front seat and Grandmom, Luke and Jack were in the back seat. I was in the middle row, facing backwards, when the bird flew out of the dashboard. The look of horror and surprise on Grandmom, Luke, and Jack’s face was terrifying. I didn’t see the bird, and could only assume Dave was driving off a cliff and our lives were over. But it all lasted about 1 second before Grandad grabbed the bird and tossed it out the window. Dave never even swerved.

>Lemon Heads

>Luke tragically reported to Dave that he “had plenty of time to eat his lunch today. Because it all fell on the floor and had to be thrown away.” He was starving and traumatized from the experience. But upon further questioning, it turns out that only the apple fell on the floor, and that 8 people tried to open his lemonheads and no one could. And that I had forgotten to pack a tube of yogurt, and for some reason he didn’t drink any milk. When I was trying to get the story straight, I asked why he didn’t use the scissors I pack in his lunchbox (for the pesky tubes of yogurt) to open the lemonheads. He signed and said, “I’m only school-smart.”

In Jack news, I heard him saying, “Mama” in his room the other morning so I walked in there. He looked up from the stuffed animal in his arms and said, “Oh, I was just talking about you.” I thought that was pretty funny, so I was sharing the story with Luke and Dave at dinner that night and they were laughing. Jack said, “I wasn’t complaining about you! I was just talking about you.” Very reassuring.

>A New Outlook

>Was I crabby yesterday? Why, yes I was. Was it obvious? I suppose. I got put in a room by myself at work today. Some might call it an office. I’m pretty sure it’s temporary so I am not getting to comfortable, but I am enjoying it because it’s a huge upgrade from my cube. And I did leave my mug there at the end of the day, so I suppose I’ll be going back tomorrow.

>File Under: Tragic. Cross Reference: Time to Job Search

>This blogging once a day thing is going to be more difficult than I thought since, not only can I not take pictures, but I can’t get current pictures off my camera. Yea me!

So onward to misc. Jack news: Jack can recite a poem. Adorable. No video due to the camera situation, but maybe he’ll do it over the phone if you call. See how I stopped pretending that anyone besides grandparents are reading this?

Umm. In other news, all I do is work. I really need to remember what my hobbies are and become too busy to do anything but have a life, and write a blog about it.

Today my work strategy was to wear a lot of eye makeup. The plan was two-fold. 1.) It was a great way to procrastinate. 2.) Less chance I would get really mad and start crying.

>Bacon and Eggs and November

>I was a deviled egg for Halloween. Dave was a capitalist pig. It was well into the evening before we realized we were bacon and eggs. Well into an evening during which I threatened to egg my neighbor’s house via txt message. That is to say, I threatened him via txt, not that I tried to egg him via txt. Is anyone starting to think they’d prefer the Halloween picture instead of the 1,000 words? Too bad, I broke my camera. Sob.

I do have some pictures from before the incident, but I am way too lazy to cross the room and get the camera and the wire thingy. But don’t worry, it’s November! And I plan to blog at least once a day this month. And that often means many days with just a picture and a quick note.

>Friday Night

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Originally, this post was about the costumes that Jack was wore on Friday (pirate), Sunday (fireman) and Monday (Power Ranger). But this is the only picture from Friday, and as you can see, “pirate” was just one of many layers.

The short version of this new post is: That’s my purse wrapped in a plastic bag in the basket of my bike.

Long version? The plan for Friday night was to bike to the CU Homecoming parade, then drop Luke off at a birthday party at the bowling alley on campus, then bike to Pearl Street and have dinner, then bike back to get Luke, hang out, and then bike home. It was a great plan, a plan that I LOVED. Until it started raining. Then I started thinking… you know what would be fun? Laundry. Laundry, and wine. Drive to campus… drop off Luke, etc. I floated the idea but Dave ignored me and continued to pack layers of clothes for the boys.

We were all in the garage getting on bikes when it really started to pour. Dave said it was never going to work, but I convinced him we should just ride our bikes to a parade in a downpour. (Or else, he possibly used reverse psychology to convince me to go. I know I yelled something like, “No, I want to stay home and do laundry, but I am being a good sport so LET’S GO!”) We thought it was raining hard when we left the house but it got worse. Just as one of our friends was thinking to herself, “I must be completely insane to be biking home in this,” she saw us coming in the opposite direction and cracked up.

Once we got to the parade, it stopped raining and the rest of the night went as planned, and was very fun. And the next morning, I got to brag about how hard core I am. I ran into a friend on Saturday morning and told her about our adventure. She said. “Wow! You guys are hard core!” I said, “Ummmmm…” And she said, “I mean, your guy is hard core.” But I am a good sport.

>Countdown to Costume

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Halloween is a week from today and the costume situation is making me nervous.

Luke plans to be a ninja, so I bought him a black hoodie today. Yup, that is as far as we have gotten. Fortunately we all do our best work under pressure. Well, I did also buy a pattern for sort of a generic boy superhero series, and I figured that would help us with the mask. (For which I have not purchased fabric.) And I am a little worried about dressing Luke in head to toe black and sending him out in the dark to run around the neighborhood. So I also bought glow sticks. Hopefully Luke can be talked into disco ninja or something.

As for Jack, I bought a fireman costume a month or so ago, because it was cute, and fleece, so I thought it would come in handy if it was cold. But it just got absorbed into the costume bin(s) and it isn’t a front runner. Jack dresses in costume almost daily, so I guess getting candy for it will be what makes Halloween special for him. In fact, part of Jack’s layered ensemble for biking to the homecoming parade in a torrential downpour on Friday night was a pirate costume. Today he was wearing a power ranger mask with his PJs and slaying bad guys, Boba Fett, the Emperor, and monsters in the basement. In fact, this post was originally going to be just his play monologue, but after I started typing it out, the post skewed more “mom lets her 2 year old watch too much violence on tv” than “hilarious mom has adorable and creative 2 year old.”

As for Lucy, I was intrigued by the costumes at Target. Specifically the squirrel costume, but it was pointed out to me that it looks like, well, let’s say it looks like a squirrel is riding on the dogs back. Also, I thought I should see how she like’s being in costume before I spent too much money. So I got her a very modestly priced cape and she really wanted to eat it.

As for Dave and I, we don’t have costumes yet. I was originally thinking of changing my hair and being Joan, but now I am thinking Liz Lemon is a little more realistic. I guess I just need to know if Dave is planning to be Roger Sterling, or Kenneth.

>Where in the World is MetaMegan?

>MetaMegan is having an existential work/life crisis, which makes for extremely boring blog posts. When I am at the computer, which is all the time, I feel the need to work. When I am not at the computer, I am not at the computer and therefore cannot blog.

Let me know if you want to be added to my newsletter, that I will be handwriting and running through the mimeograph, and then snail mailing. Or maybe I could blog from my phone… But the 1/R key doesn’t work. And the keys are so tiny. Example: “On bus to Denve. New commute is going to suck. ” Not exactly my best work.

Jack goes to a hippie daycare in Boulder, where they are very in touch with their feelings. That causes me to be extremely aware about how I feel about work because whenever I start talking about it at the dinner table, Jack says, “Are you mad, Momma? Sad? Angry? Frustrated? You gonna cry?” It’s very insightful.

In other Jack news, he woke me up on Saturday by screaming, “MOMMA! GET OUT HERE AND MAKE ME BREFFAST!” That was at 7:00 am. Today, when my alarm was (not) set for 5:00 am, I woke up at 7:15 to giggles from the living room. Sigh.

Luke’s school conference was today, and he’s a perfect little gentleman and scholar. We ran into the art teacher in the hallway and she also said she loved him, and did we have any more at home? We said, “Yes, but…”

I thought about doing the thing where you write a novel during the month of November, but I think I’ll put that off and do the thing where I blog every day in the month of November. My novel planning was going like this: Go to the farmers market with cute single friend. Notice farmers checking her out. Tell her, “In my novel, you’d fall in love with the gorgeous, brooding photographer/documentarian, but he’d be all wrong for you. All along you should have been with the smiling, friendly guy from the mushroom stand.” And she said, “But I like the photographer.” And I said, “Exactly. But he’s wrong for you. You’ll see in my novel.” Then I realized my novel had already been written a thousand times, so I turned it into an anecdote on my blog. Then I showed some amazing restraint in not linking to the photographer and the mushroom guy. Then I remembered I was supposed to be working and at this rate I would never get to sleep.